Thursday, February 11, 2010

Not that kind of mom?

So tomorrow Madaya has her first Valentine's Day party at school!
Talk about funny.
You know she loves ben cooper .... lol.
So this year I had many intentions. I would make the cutest valentines, the cutest little cupcakes and show everyone just how special Daya's mom is....

Well, heres my admission :
I really really love to craft, and lord knows I can create beyond all, but this is not about me, this is Daya. So with that I refuse to be one of those mom's who show up only to show off MY work as to show who is who. Its not who I want to be, and honestly don't want to be thought of as " the mom who does it all " . Daya did a great job. She picked out tinker bell cards, hand scribbled on them :) and we made chocolate cupcakes to which we frosted with store bought ( I KNOW CAN YOU BELEIVE US?! ) frosting, and then she put candy hearts on top!
You know what.... I kind of like the fact that I am " Not that kind of mom! ".

I cannot wait to see her party. I am hoping to make it if I don't have a full day at work....

1 year and still ..... just.... still

In Loving Memory of Kaydough
Laid to rest Feb 11, 2009.

I'm Still Here
Please don't mourn for me, I'm still here, though you don't see. I'm right by your side each night and day, and within your heart I long to stay. My body is gone, but I'm always near. I'm everything you feel, see or hear. My spirit is free, but I'll never depart, as long as you keep me alive in your heart. I'll never wander out of your sight, I'm the brightest star on a summer night. I'll never be beyond your reach, I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach. I'm the colorful leaves, when fall comes around, and the pure white snow that blankets the ground. I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond, the clear cool water in a quiet pond. I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring, the first warm raindrop that April will bring. I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine, and you'll see that the face in the moon is mine. When you start thinking there's no one to love you, you can talk to me through the Lord above you. I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees, and you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze. I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep And the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep. I'm the smile you see on a baby's face. Just look for me, I'm everyplace!
Today marks 1 year since we lost our " bubba ".
Ive been " Moody" all day and I guess this is alot to do with it.
Man do we miss that dog! More than a dog, Kaydough was my boy.
It's really crazy to think that even to this day I cannot call him in from outside, to offer him his favorite treat and have a little chat.
Its still so fresh, and so often that Madaya asks of him, and why he is with Jesus. It still hurts.

Our world has come full circle, we have another addition to our fur children, and while I really thought it would ease the pain I still so much feel, in some ways its harder.
Like now, Hanna looks SO FAT, and fluffy just like bubba did when he was a baby. Its like yesterday! Sometimes it makes me really think Kaydough played a big part in this!
Kaydough is only missed more and more.... but we all hope the pain eases soon!